Cancer, Recovery, and What Matters Most

Twelve weeks. That’s how long it has been since I had surgery to remove a cancerous mass from my kidney and had a partial nephrectomy, which is just a fancy way of saying — we took most of your kidney but left a little behind. Thankfully, 25% of my right kidney is still hanging in there and doing its best and my body is trying to figure it all out.

There’s a lot I could say about the journey, but let me start here…I am healing. I am grateful. And I am happy. That doesn’t mean it’s been easy…far from it. There have been hard days, some setbacks, and more medical appointments than I care to count. But alongside all of that, there have also been so many blessings — an unbelievable amount of kindness, deepened relationships, and a whole new appreciation for things I used to overlook.

Sometimes I catch myself just sitting in awe, thinking about the last four months and how quickly life flipped upside down. The first few weeks felt like a never-ending loop of appointments, scans, and waiting rooms. These days, I’m juggling six specialists plus my regular doctor — so yes, I basically have a medical entourage now. Life is definitely busier, but in a completely different way. It’s not the kind of busy I used to know.

Pathology:

I am super grateful that the pathology report came back with positive news. I was diagnosed with clear cell renal cell carcinoma (a common type of kidney cancer) and the tumor was considered a Grade 2 tumor. I feel very thankful to have caught it early! The margins were clear, meaning the surgeon removed the entire tumor. The surgeon removed one lymph node that looked suspicious but no signs that the kidney cancer spread to it.

What’s Next?

Although my pathology report showed that the kidney tumor was fully contained, and the nearby lymph node was clear, my oncologist wants to be thorough. The next step is a chest CT scan to make sure there are no signs that the cancer spread to other lymph nodes or areas in my lungs.

My oncologist has a great sense of humor, which I can appreciate. At my last visit, he joked, Knowing you, something will probably show up on that chest CT…since you’ve managed to grow something weird just about everywhere else! We both laughed, because… well, he’s not wrong. If there’s a surprise to be had, my body seems to love providing one. Thankfully, he’s thorough, and the scan is just to cover all the bases.

I have one small lesion on my pancreas that my urologist and gastroenterologist wants to watch to make sure it doesn’t grow. I will be doing MRI’s every 3 months to monitor the pancreas and the kidney plus blood work every month.

Next steps all hinge on what the chest CT shows. I’m feeling really good about it though. I’ve got a strong gut feeling that it will come back clear. Staying positive is half the battle, right?

New Perspective:

But, I have to say that the silver lining in all of this is that I have been able to slow down and spend such wonderful time with the people I love so much. Getting a cancer diagnosis is like someone hitting the brakes on your life. Everything that used to feel urgent suddenly isn’t. I always tell people that it gives you a great perspective to not sweat the small stuff! The trivial stuff just doesn’t matter.

I have had so many special friends and family come by to visit. When I was first recovering from surgery and spent most of the day in bed, I had daily visitors drop by to bring me lunch and dinner every single day…and just sit in my bed and chat. I loved it!! Life stood still for a while and I was able to just be with so many who I cherish, love, and adore. We cried together, we laughed together and I will always look back with gratitude for that time and those slow days. Even though I was physically struggling and in pain, they helped brighten my days and showed such love and support. And thank you so much for your beautiful messages of support. I read every single one and I appreciate them so much!

As much as I felt like I “needed” to get back to work, I realized that I loved the simplicity of those days. There wasn’t a long to-do list of things to get done. It was all about healing and connecting with my loved ones. In that quiet, you realize the greatest achievement isn’t getting everything done but the relationships that you have filled your life with. I know that I am super blessed with beautiful souls and angels in my life and they have helped me through this more than they can know!

Back to Work?

I’ve been wrestling with the disconnect between my mind and my body. Mentally, I’m ready to jump back in and to return to the routines and pace that feel like “normal” to me. But physically, I am just not there. My body is still recovering. After surgery and a recent bout of pneumonia, my immune system is not up to speed yet.

I had two work trips planned and they were wonderful but I did notice that I am not 100% back yet and I know that I need to give myself grace and just allow time to heal.

My parents are celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary this year so we decided to all go on a family cruise to celebrate. Once I received my cancer diagnosis, I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to make it but I was determined to make it happen! It was much fun being with my parents, my husband, and my siblings and their wives. My sister-in-laws and Mom were awesome…always reminding me to go slow and let my body heal. I am so grateful that I was able to go and spend time with them!

Thank you for all of the emails, DM’s, messages, comments, and texts. I apologize if I haven’t replied to you yet. I am hoping that one day I can do that but just know that I am very GRATEFUL for your kindess and for thinking of me! Your words of encouragement and prayers have helped me so much.

I LOVE being in the kitchen creating new recipes to share with you!! I have been recipe testing again and can’t wait to share all of my recipes. If you want to see my NEW RECIPES, CLICK HERE.

Lots of love to all of you,

Melissa